I will start off with a confession of sorts. I hate laundry. Folding, sorting, hanging, ironing. This is not a life sustaining activity and yet people are compelled to do it. You may be sitting there thinking, okay Colleen, so do you just walk around in dirty clothes all the time?....No, I do it and hate every minute of it.
Think about it. The washing part starts out okay. I get the stuff into the washer and later move it to the dryer. Not so bad right? There is very little commitment in that kind of chore....but then the frustration begins. First it's one or two socks that seem to have gone missing. Then the next day I'm in the middle of making dinner and figure I'll fold the basket of microscopic mismatched children's socks later. Then one or two items have stains or holes that need repair and BOOM!! It happens. You have your first full basket of work. But life doesn't stop. No it just keeps going at full tilt. One basket becomes two, then three. I swear these things mate. Before you know it you are stepping over and around baskets. Maybe even having to buy more baskets to hold all your stuff. I have been know to go buy more clothes rather than dig through the piles to find a pair of something. You'd think I might figure out that eventually these new clothes will also require laundering. I know this in my head but it seems so much easier at the time.
Have you ever watched an interview with people who just won the lottery? When asked what they are going to do with their millions they inevitably say something like "I'm buying my mom the house she could never afford" or "I'm going to travel". Not me. No sir. I will be placing an ad in the newspaper to acquire a laundry servant. No windows, no toilets, no floors. Just laundry. I will continue to clean my own windows, toilets, and floors so as to ensure that I do not run out of money for a full time laundry professional.
Okay I know what you're thinking. I'm just lazy and I should fold the damn laundry already. You are right. When it comes to laundry I am lazy with a big "L". I have the right to be. I am a single mother of a crazy household who plays soccer, volunteers, works full time, and is actively involved in every aspect of her kids lives. My achilles heal has a spin cycle. So laundry is my dirty little secret. I always have clean clothes but if I show up for work with wrinkles after the clothes sat in the dryer or I have cat hair on my towels because my lovely feline thought the basket of clean clothes would make a great bed just pretend you saw nothing. I don't need your disapproving stares. I'm probably too busy pulling the dryer sheet out of my sleeve to notice you anyway. I smell good. What do you people want from me anyway?
Think about it. The washing part starts out okay. I get the stuff into the washer and later move it to the dryer. Not so bad right? There is very little commitment in that kind of chore....but then the frustration begins. First it's one or two socks that seem to have gone missing. Then the next day I'm in the middle of making dinner and figure I'll fold the basket of microscopic mismatched children's socks later. Then one or two items have stains or holes that need repair and BOOM!! It happens. You have your first full basket of work. But life doesn't stop. No it just keeps going at full tilt. One basket becomes two, then three. I swear these things mate. Before you know it you are stepping over and around baskets. Maybe even having to buy more baskets to hold all your stuff. I have been know to go buy more clothes rather than dig through the piles to find a pair of something. You'd think I might figure out that eventually these new clothes will also require laundering. I know this in my head but it seems so much easier at the time.
Have you ever watched an interview with people who just won the lottery? When asked what they are going to do with their millions they inevitably say something like "I'm buying my mom the house she could never afford" or "I'm going to travel". Not me. No sir. I will be placing an ad in the newspaper to acquire a laundry servant. No windows, no toilets, no floors. Just laundry. I will continue to clean my own windows, toilets, and floors so as to ensure that I do not run out of money for a full time laundry professional.
Okay I know what you're thinking. I'm just lazy and I should fold the damn laundry already. You are right. When it comes to laundry I am lazy with a big "L". I have the right to be. I am a single mother of a crazy household who plays soccer, volunteers, works full time, and is actively involved in every aspect of her kids lives. My achilles heal has a spin cycle. So laundry is my dirty little secret. I always have clean clothes but if I show up for work with wrinkles after the clothes sat in the dryer or I have cat hair on my towels because my lovely feline thought the basket of clean clothes would make a great bed just pretend you saw nothing. I don't need your disapproving stares. I'm probably too busy pulling the dryer sheet out of my sleeve to notice you anyway. I smell good. What do you people want from me anyway?
