We were out camping this weekend as we have been most of the weekends this summer. The kids have been having lots of fun exploring the rock beach at the river that runs beside our campground. I don't let them go down to the beach alone because I'm kind of paranoid they will get swept away. So that means the adults have to hear "Mom I was thinking about the beach and I'm not trying to pressure you so I'm not asking if we can go there soon". Subtle like a sledge hammer right?
So tonight Camryn and I went for a walk over there and she happily waded in the water, looked at rocks, and "saved" driftwood by setting if free so that it could be happy again.....yah not quite like pushing a beached whale back in honey. I sometimes wonder if someday I won't get a call from some foreign official that Camryn has been arrested while trying to save some endangered species from something. If she worries about driftwood....well let's hope the other government is friendly with Canada.
So after freeing all the sticks she could see we were walking back to our trailer. It was sunset and the sky was a beautiful mix of orange and pink clouds. Camryn reached out and gently grabbed my hand. It seemed like a perfect moment. Then she looks up at me with a very serious look on her sweet little face and says "Mommy sometimes I wish I was an orphan". "Um......Oh?" I said. Not really certain just what the appropriate response should be when your child wishes you were dead and they were all alone in the world. So I asked her why she wished to be an orphan hoping that it has nothing to do with me. To my relief it turns out that if she were an orphan she could live in nature all alone away from people....as if she couldn't just do that without sacrificing me in the process. Yah. The down side she said is that she'd be pretty sad and lonely if a bear attacked her and nobody was there to help. So now she doesn't want me to die after all. Phew.....and I was worried.
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